Peter Salanki from San Francisco, USA - The bisexual pride flag Uploaded by Anastasiarasputin

Homens Bissexuais: Será Que Nós Existimos Mesmo?

Com a quantidade de aceitações recentes da ideia de a sexualidade ser um espectro, chega a ser peculiar o fato de que homens bissexuais sintam a necessidade de defender a sua existência em pleno 2020.

Story by Hal Fulcher. Translated by by Joana Fedato
Australia, Oceania
Published on Thursday, 5. March 2020

Reading time: 3 minutes

This story is also available in GB de it kr nl



Ser um adolescente bissexual nunca foi fácil. Quando eu ouvi o termo “bissexual” pela primeira vez aos 13 anos, a primeira coisa que me veio à mente foi um “Aha!”, enquanto ao mesmo tempo tentava rejeitar a ideia a todo custo. “Eu gosto da Kristen da aula de matemática, portanto sou hétero” pensava comigo mesmo, evitando ao máximo pensar nos meninos da minha classe, pelos quais me sentia atraído. 

Crescer em uma pequena e homofóbica cidade na Austrália me fez sempre negar a minha atração por homens. Enquanto meus amigos embarcavam em seus primeiros amores de juventude, eu estava me esforçando ao máximo para fingir que nem teria uma sexualidade – esperando que a vida fosse voltar a ser como era antes de ser atingido pela puberdade. “Talvez se eu ler Harry Potter pela décima vez e agir como se estivesse tudo bem, vou conseguir sobreviver ao colegial.” – Meu monólogo interior por volta de 2003.

Somente no começo dos meus 20 anos eu comecei a me sentir confortável ao admitir ser bissexual –  para mim mesmo e depois para os outros ao meu redor. Enquanto, por um lado, tudo tenha ficado mais fácil me permitindo me sentir mais leve, por outro ser bissexual não deixa de ser um obstáculo nos meus relacionamentos e na forma como as pessoas à minha volta me veem.  Às vezes penso se isso não é nada mais que os preconceitos da minha cidade natal vindo à tona – mesmo que eu tenha saído da Austrália aos 22 anos e vivido em diversas capitais européias mais acolhedoras. Todavia, algo sempre me surpreende: as sobrancelhas erguidas e a desconfiança que sempre confronto ao contar a alguém sobre a minha bissexualidade, vinda tanto de gays quanto de héteros.  No passado fui rejeitado por mulheres héteras por ser gay, ou por homens gays que reclamaram que eu eventualmente iria largá-los por uma mulher.

Essa sensação de não se sentir pertencer nem à comunidade hétera nem à gay pode ser explicada pela reportagem do “Center for American Progress”, a qual aponta, através de uma série de indicadores sociais e de saúde, que bissexuais sofrem mais que héteros ou gays. Por exemplo, enquanto a probabilidade de um homem gay viver em situação de pobreza é o dobro do que a de um homem hétero, o número duplica para homens bissexuais – algo que me deixou apavorado ao descobrir, considerando principalmente que os bissexuais compõem a maior parte da comunidade LGBT – cerca de 52% de acordo com um estudo do “Movement Advancement Project” de 2016. Mas nós também parecemos ser os menos visíveis na sociedade – onde estão os bares e os grupos de suporte aos bissexuais? Evidentemente ausentes.

O pior dos casos é quando não acreditam que a minha sexualidade sequer existe. Recentemente, no dia 24 de fevereiro, houve um tópico mundial nas tendências do Twitter: #BisexualMenExist, no qual – sim, você advinhou – homens bissexuais refutaram esta crença de longa data de que somos fictícios ou até criaturas imaginárias que vivem em algum lugar ao norte de Nárnia.

Com a quantidade de aceitações recentes da ideia de a sexualidade ser um espectro, chega a ser peculiar o fato de que homens bissexuais sintam a necessidade de defender a sua existência em pleno 2020.

Evidentemente, mulheres bissexuais não parecem sofrer o mesmo problema ao tentar provar que a sua sexualidade realmente existe. Provavelmente isso está relacionado com o fato de homens heterosexuais (leia-se: sociedade patriarcal) fetichizarem a ideia de duas mulheres juntas sexualmentre, e ainda desejando atenção masculina. Entretanto, dois homens juntos não satisfazem o desejo de um homem hétero, portanto os dois são claramente 100% gay. Eu quero dizer, ALGUÉM É 100% ALGUMA COISA OU OUTRA?! A sexualidade binária me confunde e eu nunca vou sinceramente entendê-la.

Outra razão pela qual eu acho que a existência de homens bissexuais é às vezes posta em questão é a grave falta da nossa representação na televisão e na mídia em geral. DESCULPA, MAS ONDE NÓS ESTAMOS? Mesmo tendo crescido na Austrália onde qualquer tipo de representação era -  eu diria mesmo – completamente inexistente.

Isso, felizmente, junto com a representação de outras identidades queer, está começando a mudar. As plataformas estão mostrando cada vez mais diversas sexualidades e identidades de gênero em sua programação.  

Para concluir, homens sexuais existem? Uhhh... Sim, duh. Somos às vezes marginalizados e tratados como invisíveis? Também sim. Porém as coisas estão melhorando.


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Hal Fulcher

Hal Fulcher

Hal Fulcher accidentally shoplifted this scarf moments before this photo was taken. Upon realizing his mistake, he was too embarrassed to reenter the shop and instead enjoyed its warmth for several weeks before losing it at a cafe in Venice. He is 30-years-old, studied a Master in International Studies on Media, Power, and Difference at Universitat Pompeu Fabra in Barcelona and is currently enjoying the Manchester music scene. 

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